What Sigma is to Me

This summer, I have said so many times “I miss Sigma,” and almost every time, I get asked, “What is Sigma?” Every time I am faced with this question, I have no idea how to answer it. I have decided that it is time to explain what exactly Sigma is to me.
Sigma is recruitment and discovering my sisters. It is the tears that fell during the final round of recruitment when I realized that I had found a group of women who would become my sisters. It is the pounding in my chest when I was handed that envelope with my name neatly written on it in purple and my invitation to join an amazing sisterhood inside. It is the rush of joy that flooded over me when I saw my sisters come running into the ballroom all decked out in their red, white, and blue. It is the hugs that I got from sisters who had no idea who I was, but still loved me just because I was one of them. It is bonding over “#shorthairprobs” and dancing back at the house. It is laughing as Erin Wood gushed about how beautiful we all were and how excited she was to have us. Sigma is finding a home.
Sigma is the getting-to-know-you phase during Homecoming. It is guessing at the words to all of the cheers during the parade, and laughing when all of us messed up the words. It is running into girls that I knew were sisters and asking them to go to the football game with me. It is that moment on the shuttle to the stadium when I discovered (as Savannah calls her) my “soulmate best friend” with the simple phrase, “What the hell is a Hufflepuff?” It is sitting through the first half of the game in the pouring rain, but laughing hysterically because the whole thing was just ridiculous. Sigma is the sisters that you discover.
Sigma is my relationship with my amazingly beautiful and fantastic Big, Lexi. It is the squeal that came out of my mouth when I got my first text from my Big before reveal, and having everyone in the house turn to stare at me. It is the crazy random questions that I asked her when I was trying to figure out who she was, such as “If we were in the cast of Mean Girls, what table would you sit at in the cafeteria?” It is guessing who she was on Monday night when she let something slip. It is figuring out that I had a twin. It is that moment during reveal when I heard her voice behind me during reveal. It is the first words out of my mouth after reveal: “You dirty liar!” It is the hours we spent together just sitting in the Hub laughing and talking about nothing in particular. It is the post-chapter Walmart run when we were wearing our white dresses with sweatpants, just because we didn’t feel like changing. It is the amount of glitter paint I used to make sure her birthday present was absolutely perfect. It is her instinct to scream at a lady who backed into her car, simply because I was sitting right next to where she hit. It is the hug she gave me when we said good-bye before summer vacation, when she almost didn’t let me go. It is the fact that her boyfriend had to hold her back so she wouldn’t keep me from leaving the day I went to visit her. Sigma is the unconditional love that you have constant access to.
Sigma is working with my sisters for a good cause. It is when we worked and raised over $2,000 in less than a week before TSNL. It is Beth’s manly voice in the voiceover for our skit. It is the cheers that came out of all of our mouths when they announced the total that night. It is the hours of dancing to the songs of Frozen when rehearsing for Lip Sync. It is Ashley telling all of us to pretend we are Idina Menzel on Broadway when we’re syncing to the songs. It is the cheers from the Delta Zetas when they heard the opening music of “Do You Want to Build a Snowman?” It is laughing at Sarah in her Olaf costume. It is being handed the trophies for first place performance and second place overall. It is piling into Megan’s car for GMA filming, with all of us wearing shorts when it was maybe 30 degrees outside. It is Sam telling us that we needed more “sass” and telling me to hair flip when I don’t exactly have hair to flip. It is watching Juhl get a shamrock shake to the face for the good of the video. It is walking out of the Kappa Sigma house with Grigsby after a long night of filming. Sigma is working together to promote a cause that is bigger than us as individuals.
More than anything else, Sigma is the little things. It is the conversations that I had with people I have never spoken to before that made absolutely no sense, but at the same time they did. It is laughing at Savannah’s rants in the living room of the house. It is Cara’s nicknames, such as “Red Velvet.” It is a sister who laughs as she helps you patch up your knees after falling down the stairs, and then gets you a bagel sandwich just to make you feel better. It is the late nights “studying for finals” with Buzzfeed quizzes and wings from Rosie’s delivery. It is having someone who just says to you “LOVE ME!” Sigma is more than anything the sisters who stand by you through thick and thin, who laugh at you when you fall, but are right there to help you up, and who drop everything to call you during a crisis, even if they are in the middle of something at work.
Marilyn Monroe once said, “I’m selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can’t handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don’t deserve me at my best.” My sisters not only handle me at my worst, they support me and give me never-ending unconditional love. These amazing women do not just deserve me at my best, they are the ones who make me my best. That, my friend, is what Sigma truly is.
Ellen McDougle

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